Mea Culpa or What The Fuck Happened?

This is my first post to this blog in a long time. Too long.

Why?

I haven’t been writing.

I’ve been finding ways to avoid writing.

Too tired.

Too busy at work.

Too much theatre.

Uninspired.

Unmotivated.

Unhealthy.

Undead.

One of these may be an exaggeration.

Oh, I’ve been ‘writing’. Writing reviews. Writing critiques. Writing status updates. Writing tweets. Writing lists. Writing about not writi—ahem.

It’s a terrible thing to call yourself a writer and not write.

Even worse when you’re half decent at it. I mean, anyone who’s crap at writing can not write with a guilt free conscience.  

But mine has finally gotten the better of me.

(Using ‘gotten’ in a sentence for a start stings).

A quick recap.

The feature script based on a true life story set just after the Great War fell through. Couldn’t agree to terms with the businessman/producer. Great story. Hope it sees the light of day.

The first two episodes of the web series Boondock Alley have been shot. I don’t know how the shoot went or how it will turn out. I haven’t had anything to do with the project after blowing a gasket when I wasn’t invited to the table read with the full cast during pre-production. I also haven’t written any of the supporting material used on the website or on various social media platforms. Nevermind. Hope it goes well. I thought it was a pretty good idea for a series.

The feature script Turbulence. Ah, yes, Turbulence. I sat and re-read the partially rewritten seventh draft at work today during lunch.

Then I wanted to stick an ice-pick in my brain.

Why?

It’s pretty good. Leastways it’s getting there. I am mad at myself for not getting on with it. I don’t know why. It pisses me off.

So things have to change.

I’m getting frustrated and angry at myself. I have been sucked back into corporate servitude. Yes, the money is good. Who am I kidding? It’s fucking glorious! I’ll end up going to Sydney twice this year as well as my annual Melbourne musical theatre jaunt because I can afford such extravagances. And I’m good at it. Work that is. Hell, I might even occasionally admit to liking it from time to time though I have become prone to stress lately which is unlike me.

Yes, I love the theatre. If I didn’t I would be monumentally screwed. I saw 138 shows last year. 71 so far this year and checking my diary I’m currently on pace for 131 by year’s end. Total, absolute, marvellous craziness of a magnitude I couldn’t even begin to fathom a few years ago.

I will honour my commitments as an adjudicator and reviewer but my pre-eminent thought and task has to be writing again. I want to finish Turbulence. It will make a great little thriller. I want to start something new. I have no idea what that might be. I don’t care. I just need to write.

My unit has been renovated and now I have a nice space I can write in. I don’t need the excuse of cafes or distraction free zones somewhere, anywhere else. I just need some goddamn fucking discipline.

I’m getting ranty.

I’m sorry.

For not knuckling down and getting on with it. 

For procrastinating. 

For letting setbacks and disappointments cripple me.

That all changes now.

Back from the Wilderness or Belated Update

I am here to announce that the Great Theatre Rebellion of 2014 has finally been put down… kind of. Yes, it’s true. I have seen a hell of a lot of theatre this year - over one hundred productions. I have also reviewed, well, ahem, over one hundred productions. While I enjoy this theatrical diversion I’ve hit the ‘rookie wall’ and can’t sustain the cracking pace. 

Plus I have to, you know, write.

So what’s been happening on that front, Richard?

Thank you for asking fictional & anonymous blog reader.

The sixth draft of the feature script Turbulence has been coming along… slowly. Too slowly but now the stage production obsession is in remission it’s something I’ll be returning to with a vengeance. In related news my director is moving back to Melbourne. I half suspect it’s in protest of my glacial writing ways but apparently it has more to do with the Carlton Football Club and the kind of Victorian lifestyle one doesn’t find in WA. Thank goodness for Skype.

The web series Boondock Alley now has a facebook page and even a website. Not bad for something ‘still in development’ which I believe is the euphemistic term for ‘ain’t nuthin’ been shot yet’. The search for a producer has been ongoing with lots of people “loving the concept”, asking for scripts then never being heard from again. This leads me to a few possible conclusions – the scripts are so fucking awful as to induce the sort of demise one might find in The Ring. You know, after reading the script, your mobile rings and a dodgy ADR track whispers, “seven days”. The prospective producer then loses all possible means of communication in some catastrophic meltdown thus rendering them helpless. Except to post pictures of cats and selfies on various social media platforms. It’s a curious phenomenon! Other conclusions have been self-censored for fear of causing offence.

However, there was a meeting Saturday past at some ungodly hour in the morning as insisted by a complete moron (namely me) where we tried something a little different. A face to face pitch then the physical handing of the Bible and Pilot script to two gentlemen who seemed switched on with strong credentials. One of my actor/producer colleagues received a call 7am Monday morning to say they loved it and were “in”. The way to avoid The Ring style curse is clearly not to email the script – there’s always a loophole in those horror stories! This could be a promising development with talk of a January shoot… let’s see how things progress.

On the very same day, a businessman I met at a producing course who subsequently pitched me a feature film idea on the rooftop of a boutique bar in the city as we celebrated the ending of said course… man, this is a loooooong sentence… *deep breath*… sent me a whole lot of material to read with a view to see if it could be turned into a script. This is after a weird conversation about ISIS, ebola and filmmaking. Only two of those things threaten to destroy the fabric of civilisation as we know it… though there are times it could be all three if someone makes me sit through movies like Godzilla again. 

Oh, hey! Did I mention? I did a producing course!!!! So frustrated with the inability to get short film scripts and the web series made I decided to pretty much splash out on an FTI course in sheer desperation. Six times three hour sessions conducted by Tenille Kennedy who I have known for a while and now have an even greater appreciation for her producing skills. I’m not sure it’s what I really want to do and Tenille has a wealth of experience and knowledge that would take me a long time to acquire. I want someone like her to produce my scripts not try and be her. But it certainly gave me some great insights from a different perspective and oh, hey, did I mention the networking/pitching over drinks thing?

That’s pretty much it other than to say it’s been a strangely film orientated few days with the other director I have developed projects with contacting me out of the blue today and we had a coffee and chat. Maybe it’s all a sign for me to pull my proverbial out and get on with the Turbulence draft… 

PS Australia Post - when someone sends you a certificate in the mail and the envelope says "Please don't bend" it actually means Please don't fucking turn it into an origami swan to get it into the letterbox!

But, didn’t you use to be a screenwriter?

I know what you’re thinking – “Richard, what’s with all the theatre reviews on your blog lately… didn’t you use to be a screenwriter?”

Richard enters stage left and peers out at the audience. Adopts an aggressive stance.

Richard: That’s absurd; of course I’m still a screenwriter.

Audience member: Prove it then!

Richard squints into the lights trying to identify the wag.

Richard: Reveal yourself, Sir/Madam/[insert correct gender salutation for a small child or possibly a verbose animal of some description].

The challenge is met with a slow handclap. Only a few people at first… then dozens of hands in unison. The sound builds in intensity until Richard is brought to his knees, hands clasped to his ears.

Richard: Alright, alright. I confess. I have been tempted by the sins of theatrical endeavour; swayed by the spontaneity of live performance; awed by the camaraderie and passion found in every independent troupe of players. Dazzled by –

Audience: Get off!

Richard is pelted with rotten fruit, robust vegetables, and random pieces of furniture. He beats a hasty retreat to –

FADE IN:

INT. CAFÉ – NIGHT

Richard sits in his favourite writing haunt and laments the fact that the inability to format blogger correctly for the difference between stage and screen directions dilutes the visual effect intended for this convoluted introduction… 

Yes! I AM still writing!!! Spasmodically. Imprecisely. Incrementally.

The fifth draft of Turbulence was delivered to the director a little while ago and I have read his summary of what needs to be addressed in the next draft. I should, at this very moment, be reading his detailed notes embedded in the pdf version of the script but, of course, I forgot to bring the flash drive with me (Richard pelts himself with rotten fruit). In short, the next pass will be a character one. Progress has indeed been made - the comments count has gone from 83 to 43… or maybe I just fixed all the typos. Anyone who was at the PAC Script Lab reading a year ago would certainly recognise the story but there have been a lot of changes, especially in the second half of the script. Now we dig further and keep evolving and improving our characters.

I also finished the fourth episode of Boondock Alley, the web series set in a doctors’ surgery for the Undead. It was the hardest episode to write to date… and the darkest but the actors have responded with unanimous praise. This is flattering but also makes me a little nervous as I know it requires work. I suspect I need a critical eye to push me like Tim (director) does with Turbulence. However, it looks like we’re positioning for a tilt at ScreenWest’s newly announced Elevate funding scheme. So there will be a renewed focus on all the elements though I’m more than happy with progress to date. Ah yes, the joys of funding applications - writer’s notes!

Working fulltime has largely cut me off from the creative zeitgeist as I no longer have time to laze about on weekdays talking scripts, films and the like. It was a great pleasure then to go to the premiere of SeventhContinent Productions’ short film Rat Tale last week. Not only was it a terrific film but I caught up with many filmmaking colleagues I had not seen in a long time.

Yes, I am going to a fair amount of theatre and have even become a Friend of the Academy (WAAPA). Sometimes this is for sheer stress relief as my corporate job has burst into glorious chaos the last month. But mostly it is to experience the wonderful talent we have in Perth. I enjoy writing reviews and I figure that’s no big ask given the quality of shows I regularly encounter at a usually inexpensive cost. This year I’ve set myself to write something about every production I attend. In the past I tended to only write reviews for the shows I enjoyed. It’s time to man up and cast a critical yet constructive (hopefully) eye over every production.

But rest assured I’m still tapping away at the keyboard working on my own creative endeavours!

The stage curtains open. Richard bows deeply to rapturous applause… spots a half-eaten apple near the footlights, mid bow. Reaches for it… begins to topple… the crowd laugh. The curtains close. Thud. 

Hanging Out With Actors, Part 2 - Boondock Alley

Leon's first read of the Pilot.

At the end of August I wrote about the start of a new project where three actors had commissioned me to create a web series. At that stage I only had a vague idea what I was going to write about and had committed to creating a series Bible to explore this further.

I don't know if that's usually done for a web series but it certainly is a staple in television. The Bible, in effect, is a road map for the entire show. In its current state for what is now known as Boondock Alley it is 13 pages long and about 5100 words. To give you an idea of what it contains, the headings are:

Premise
The World
Character Breakdowns
Themes
Series Rules
Series One Dramatic Arc
Episode Guides

I had said to the actors that if they wanted to do this properly they had to realise that developing scripts would take time. First step was fleshing out the premise and deciding exactly what this was. I knew the basics: the tagline quickly became Boondock Alley - A doctor's surgery for the Undead. But I had no idea what the series would be about and it was important for me to find the dramatic arc so I could structure it properly. I knew I wanted to satirise both the healthcare system and the prevalence of such creatures as vampires, zombies and werewolves in modern culture. But it was important to me to do this in a coherent storyline with interesting human characters as well as the more exotic ones.

The request was for 10 x 5-7 minute episodes. The actors gave me a minor scare when they toyed with the idea of cutting it to 6 episodes after I had plotted it out. Yes, this could have been done but it would have meant some serious truncating of both story and character arcs.

Let's back up a bit. The three actors in question are Leon Grey, Anita Barnes and Catriona Coe. They have been involved at all stages in story discussions and giving input on their characters as I began to put this together. Indeed it was Leon who came up with the title after it was initially called Dead Serious.

Given the premise it was important for me to give context to the world and the two teasers here and here are more or less direct lifts from The Bible.

Once I determined the dramatic arc (discovered whilst absently listening to a rendition of Edgar Allan Poe's The Raven before a play reading in Fremantle) I began to plot the episodes. Given it was an order of 10 I used the Game of Thrones model of plotting towards a climactic ninth episode with the tenth being the ramifications of that event and setting up a possible second series (hell, if I'm going to do it might as well accept it is an ongoing universe). In loose terms then, the episodes are:

The Pilot: where the premise is established and the characters introduced.
Episode 2: a satire of the medical procedural show, notably House.
Episodes 3-5: a point of view episode for each of the three leads.
Episodes 6-8: the dramatic arc kicks into gear properly (set ups earlier)
Episode 9: Hell fire and fury reign down on our heroes (or some such thing)
Episode 10: Consequences and cliffhanger for Season 2

IF I had to shorten it to 6, episodes 3-5 would go and I would have truncated 6-8.

Now, all this was done BEFORE a single word of script was written. The Bible had one revision after feedback from the actors then came time to write the Pilot. I had the opening scene in my head and quickly captured that. When I sat down to finish the pilot it was done in one sitting and "came out" quite easily. The second episode was trickier because I had to start introducing a little more exposition into how the world of the series works but poking fun at House was fun. The third episode was harder but again was done in one sitting. At present they're all decent first drafts and the feedback has been excellent from the actors but I know I'll have to rework them.

I'll stop writing episodes now because a) it's time to see how doable this is in terms of production; b) I know that I can write episodes easily enough because the "hard work" was done putting the Bible together; and c) given the detail in the Bible the actors, who are also de facto producers, can use other writers if they wish. Though I'd certainly want to write episodes 9 & 10.

Thankfully the actors have been smart enough to acknowledge it takes time to produce quality material. I appreciate their patience and enthusiasm equally. The current scripts will need rewrites as the director gets involved and production decisions are made but I'm certainly happy with where this currently sits from a writing perspective.

The next step is turning words into moving images and I look forward to seeing what 2014 will bring in that regard!

Over to you Leon, Neets and Cat! :-)

Web Series, Teaser #2

The Undead have always existed but now they’re out in the open… and have national health care.

Within this maelstrom of distorted reality and heightened bureaucratic insanity let’s throw in three human characters through whose eyes we’ll experience the chaos and wonder of this odd little surgery with its more than odd little patients.

Each will have their own secret reason for working there. This isn’t the most glamorous of gigs - the Undead present a physical threat as well as moral and ethical dilemmas despite their legal status. What sort of person would want to spend the majority of their day amongst those who are no longer human if indeed they ever were? 

Perhaps the humans are as damaged as their patients, maybe even more so...

Boondock Alley

A doctor’s surgery for the Undead.

Coming soon in... 

...well, it's always difficult to tell with these things. I mean, the pilot is written and the next two episodes. The three leads are cast as the actors basically commissioned me to write the thing. A director is attached. There's a title and possibly a catchy jingle and theme music. For all I know there's even a POSTER! Okay, maybe a little early for the poster but things are getting serious! Now for key crew and Heads of Department and catering and extras and auditions and, did I mention, catering? But it's all looking good so far. No, really it is! So I can definitely say with much confidence, coming soon! In the future... ish. In 2014!!! Keep an eye out. The Undead are EVERYWHERE!!! 

Oh, and Merry Christmas! Remember, Vampires, Werewolves and Zombies et al are people too. Or used to be. So you should get them something. Nothing flash or fancy. Just a small gift. It would be nice. It's Christmas. 

Web Series, Teaser #1

Imagine a world where the myths were all true – the fairy tales, the legends, the whispered tales handed down from generation to generation, all of it. That creatures of the night, both foul and misunderstood, have always walked, crawled, flown, and stalked amongst us, and always will.

Then imagine that these creatures were, over time, integrated into society, and begrudgingly accepted if not embraced; that they had rights under the law. Outsiders to be sure; distinctive, vibrant, different… and still dangerous.

Boondock Alley

A doctor’s surgery for the Undead.

Hanging out with Actors? I'm Dead Serious!

There I was having lunch with a fellow corporate zombie when he suddenly asks, “you are going to write about us in your blog, aren’t you?”  As we gazed into each other’s eyes over a laminated table and a plate of bad chicken chow mein we slowly dissolved into flashback…

Okay, melodramatic nonsense aside, I was approached some time ago by said corporate zombie, who also happens to be an actor, with a proposal. He and two actresses were looking to take greater control of their careers by generating their own content, specifically by making a web series.

All of them were “older” actors (as in not 18-21 and straight out of film school) with full-time jobs and they were willing to pay for good scripts. It seems they were tired of auditioning for the unpaid student film grind and being overlooked for younger actors or, egregiously, models that had a “certain look”. They intended to approach three writers in what amounted to a tender system. They would then pick the successful candidate.

My initial response was, “hmmmm, no, not so much”. Without sounding vain (okay, maybe a little vain), I wasn’t going to “bid” for a web series. Besides, now that I’m working again, time is of the utmost premium and I have a feature script to work on.

However, as I’ve known this actor a while and he’s a good guy (don’t let this go to your head, Leon!), I said I would meet with them, listen to their ideas, and if they wanted, I could write a one to two page proposal (for a fee). If they agreed to explore it further we would talk.

The meeting is set and it’s in the lobby of the Hyatt Hotel in the early evening after everyone has finished their work commitments. “Pretty upmarket”, I think, more used to cafes and pubs as the standard meeting environment.

I don’t know one of the actresses and the other one only by work she has done on another web series. I make an early faux pas by ordering alcohol only to watch everyone else order tea. Okay, not that sort of meeting then. But, damn it, I’m a writer!

Introductions are made, small talk conducted then it’s time to get down to business. What is it they want? Now, for actors, I found the initial discussion fascinating. They were talking about where the series would be set. Related to questions of budget and how they would finance the series and all these types of things. Then it hits me, they will also be the producers if it’s their money they’re putting up. Little warning bells go off as it means I would be writing for them while also, technically, working under them.

Anyway, I finally get around to asking, “yes, but what would the web series be about? What do you want to say?” This launches us into a discussion about things I’m on much more solid ground about – theme and story and character and tone.

Now, I can be pretty charming and engaging when I want to be and we’re all hitting it off in fine style. So much so that by the end of the meeting it appears I have been “hired” and the tender process scrapped. I have no real idea what this thing is yet but everybody seems positive.

The next meeting is on home turf – the big Dome in East Vic Park. I’m still not sure what the series is about as the ideas so far (based on the actors’ suggested locations) seem very dry. But then that magic all writers crave happens – someone says something in passing and my screenwriting brain jumps about 23 steps and suddenly I know what I want to write. I pitch this new idea – a subversion of what they originally proposed – and it is enthusiastically embraced. Now I get excited which is absolutely vital if I’m going to write this thing as possibilities open up all over the place. I have a sense of tone and place and possible storylines and characters.

The next meeting and a director is in attendance. Likes the idea, speaks very well, has interesting stories to tell. Another little warning bell goes off in my head as the actors are talking crew and equipment and marketing and all sorts of other things and I am yet to write a single scripted word. But passion and enthusiasm isn’t necessarily guaranteed by all parties working on a project so there’s that at least. What is far more relevant to me is how many episodes and of what length. The initial response is 10 episodes of 5-7 minutes each.

Later I am asked for an idea of my fee and we agree on a figure to write a “bible” for the series and then a per episode amount. I am mindful that this is their own money and I am appreciative that they want to conduct this as a professional transaction.

Plans are being made for a website and marketing tools and ancillary content, all manner of things. But that’s not my concern. My first task is to produce the bible by 1 October – character breakdowns, story arcs, episode guides, themes, the world of the series; basically everything I need to write the episodes.

I haven’t gone into specific details of the project as that is the actors’ province to announce when they are ready. There is a working title, a tag line, a whole lot of early notes, and a slowly coalescing idea in my head of what this is…

I’ll know a whole lot more in a month’s time!

Fabulous West Australian Web Series needs your support - Soulfish

Last year, Henry & Aaron famously won the inaugural Movie Extra Webfest competition and $50,000 to make a 7 part web series. Those episodes air on Foxtel in under a month's time.

This year is a little more complicated for me as there are two local projects that I've had some minor involvement with (script feedback mainly) that I would like to commend for your support.

They are "The Same Paige" by good friend Anna Bennetts and "Soulfish" by a group of talented Filmbites actors under the auspices of their production company White Frawgz.

I have only known the young actors who make up White Frawgz for about six months through my involvement with Filmbites' Professional Partnership Program. But they have certainly left an impression with their talent and commitment to the craft of acting and making excellent films. The two short screenplays I've written for Filmbites should go into production next month and I'm really looking forward to seeing the outcome. If Soulfish is anything to go by they will be excellent.

I think it might have been at my last visit that it was mentioned they were writing a rom-com web series. Movie Extra Webfest seemed to be the perfect fit. I was impressed with a video they had shot for another competition and even though they weren't picked as a finalist (a quite glaring omission) it showed White Frawgz knew what they were doing.

So we come to Soulfish which has a really interesting angle about the transition from "teendom to adulthood" and looking for that special someone. There is an authenticity here that is based on the collective real life experience of the group so the development of the series will be fascinating to watch. They really are a tight knit bunch as their many and increasingly elaborate pranks can attest! When it comes to film-making though they are very savvy and very skilled.

The Link to watch the one minute trailer is: http://apps.facebook.com/mncwebfest/showentry/967434/null/4

Once you have watched, please click "Love It" under the video box. 

There is also a facebook page at: https://www.facebook.com/SoulfishTheSeries

Soulfish was written by White Frawgz and directed by Jessica Hegarty and Hannah Hugessen and stars Corey Hogan, Jessica Hegarty, Hannah Hugessen, Baden Harris, Zachary Drieberg, Jaymes Durante and Whitney Cooper.
http://youtu.be/txQLYOvQnVI

Fabulous West Australian Web Series needs your support - The Same Paige

Last year, Henry & Aaron famously won the inaugural Movie Extra Webfest competition and $50,000 to make a 7 part web series. Those episodes air on Foxtel in under a month's time.

This year is a little more complicated for me as there are two local projects that I've had some minor involvement with (script feedback mainly) that I would like to commend for your support.

They are "The Same Paige" by good friend Anna Bennetts and "Soulfish" by a group of talented Filmbites actors under the auspices of their production company White Frawgz.

Anna has read more of my work than any other person I can think of (though there's probably some poor soul, somewhere in a funding agency who enjoys that dubious pleasure!). I have read most of Anna's plays, novels, short stories, screenplays and we always offer each other constructive feedback with the minimum of physical harm inflicted! We collaborated on one short script - "Rigor Mortis" - that was a Finalist in the British Short Screenplay Competition in 2008 (out of something like 1600 entries worldwide) and have a feature screenplay - "Chrysalis" - in stasis as we work separately on other things. Both of these projects are based on Anna's original short stories.

I saw The Same Paige in its original incarnation as a stage play a few years ago. An hilarious production that has also been performed in London and will have a run at The Blue Room next year. It is fertile ground for a punchy comedy web series - about a writer who creates outrageous characters that come to life in her imagination as she deals with her partner, an engineer, who doesn't perhaps appreciate the finer points of what it means to be a writer.

The Link to watch the one minute trailer is: http://apps.facebook.com/mncwebfest/showentry/916242/null/4

Once you have watched, please click "Love It" under the video box. 

There is also a facebook page at: https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Same-Paige/301126713231156

The Same Paige was written and directed by Anna Bennetts and features the radiant Summer Williams, Kym Bidstrup and Rosemary McKenna.